e.e. cumming all over your titties: Rhythm & Breakfast
Two weeks ago I asked for a suggestion of something to write an album about. More than one person suggested Breakfast. Here it is. Link to download whole album BELOW.
Google Image Search: Rotten Sugar Cane
I’m playing a solo show on Nov 4th with Vega Under Fire. It’ll be the first “Tell Me You’re OK” show. Come and hear some Select Start songs along with some songs that were too personal or too different for SS. It’ll be interesting. I play early, so come early. :)
I thought i liked Anders Holm. Now I know it.
I’m a man, I make no excuses for that. So when I search tumblr hashtag “Sexy Woman”, I expect to have some examples that aren’t bikini spreads and borderline pornography.
You know what I find sexy? Having to use my imagination a little. A career. A set of cheek bones that say “look up here”. I think that’s lost on a lot of our “Gimme it NOW! Take it off!” society.
Or, to put it simply—>
Sexy Woman (Noun): Julianne Moore, the beauty and grace of a generation.
She combine the subtle hints of experience with the exciting promise of something new; all you crotch-flashing club hussies could learn a thing or two from Ms. (Mrs?) Moore. So why don’tcha?
Dealhshand EP5 Acting Job! My brother gets into character.
Soap Opera for Men
Recently, I was shopping at my local Sweetbay Supermarket in search of a good body wash. I came to the realization that, just as the band logo you tattooed on your arm depicts how miserable you are, the brand of body wash you buy tells a similar tale. Neither of which no one particularly cares about.
THE BASICS
1. BAR - The more siblings you have, the less disgusted you are of a little hair on a bar of soap. Mom bought 10 bars for $3.00 and that’s what you and your brothers used every month. Being the first to rub the logo off the bar was an honor rarely experienced. If you were born in the 80’s or earlier and still use a bar of soap, you live with your parents.
2. BODYWASH - The loofah was strictly a spa product that caressed womanly curves exclusively until marketers put lighting bolts on them and convinced men it’s okay to be gay. I thank God for those marketers. Men’s body wash is the best thing to happen to men. No one likes natural man musk and soap bars aren’t even close to as potent as body washes to mask said musk. Take it from someone who tours months at a time with dudes in a van. Men’s body wash is a game changer.
THE BRANDS
ZEST - As a child, Zest was marketed so well that it was as exciting to see it in my house, as it was to get my Cheesasaurus 110 film camera in the mail.
I had an idea of why girls were put on this planet and I knew that smelling like Ivory wasn’t going to get me any closer to talking to Michelle in 4th grade. Even though, all I would’ve asked her is if she’s played snes yet.
AXE - There is two facts about ANYONE who rocks Axe in their shower:
Fact One- whether they care to admit it or not. Axe users believe the commercials. They walked over to that soap aisle, paid $5.00 and expected the pussies to present themselves.
Fact Two- The pussies never have and never will present themselves.
SUAVE - Suave owners are usually divided up between a few key phrases:
“Soap is soap! Why would I pay three more dollars to have a tiger claw on the bottle?”
“Shopping for yourself is confusing. This says ‘MEN’ on bottle, I’ll just get this.”
“FUCK, I THOUGHT THIS WAS SHAMPOO!”
OLD SPICE - How Old Spice went from being your drunk uncle’s “ready to chaperone your homecoming” cologne to a seemingly legit and not so over-sexed brand of soaps and deodorant is beyond me. Old Spice doesn’t promise you will get pussy like Axe. It just promises you will become a pirate or a centaur which, really, is just as feasable.
OUCH, CARLEIGH!: American Apparel Bums Me Out.
I know this is old news but it’s managed to rear it’s disgusting, hyper-sexualized head and I just had to put it out there: American Apparel is the f-u-c-k-i-n-g-w-o-r-s-t.
My current gripe with them is the contest they are presently running to kick-start their NEXT BIG THING campaign. And what…
Dealhshand EP4. My brother likes to make fun of the fact that I’m in a band.
Pre-Review of The Dark Knight Rises by my buddy Michael Hoogveld & Four Loko.
